So, I’ll admit it - I used to have a panic problem.
Something would happen that I wasn’t expecting and my thoughts go straight from 0 - 60. I get hot, nervous, and can’t think straight. Everything is BAD and I usually end up crying on my bedroom floor.
Sound familiar?
I didn’t think my panic problem was relatable (in fact, I thought it was something I should be ashamed of), but as I started seeing more clients, I realized how common this thought pattern was!
I spent years focusing on stress management (including emotional management) because I needed it desperately. I had no stress management skills and struggled every time something unexpected happened.
Through breathing exercises and perception shifts, therapist appointments and meditation retreats, I learned how to practice stress management to help me through difficult situations.
And while it worked wonders, it took a lot of patience and work! I completely understand why people (specifically, my clients) don’t want to put in the energy…
So you can imagine my intense HAPPINESS when I was listening to an audiobook for my coaching practice and fell into a fast track process to go from panicked to productive… or as outlined in the book, “going from Oh Crap to Okay.”
The book, Just Listen by Mark Goulston, was written to help you develop listening skills. He is a psychiatrist with an impressive history of being able to guide people out of crisis situations and I was so excited when he gave these simple step by step instructions. When I heard it, I couldn’t believe how clear it could be. I stopped the tape and listened to the chapter 3 more times and I knew - I had to share this information!
Truly, I wish I’d had this from the beginning. One clear exercise that could take me from that feeling of panic back to reality. Imagine being able to respond to stressful situations in a calm and focused manner? It would be life changing!
I’ve worked so hard to find that control and I’m really excited to share this technique with you!
So, are you ready to hear the mental steps of going from panicked to productive?? Here we go!
How To Go From Oh Crap to OkayPHASE 1: OH CRAP!
This is your reaction phase. Your immediate reaction to crisis situations. Essentially, it’s your moment of panic. According to Goulston, he says its absolutely vital to put words to what you’re feeling. Don’t deny your feelings, don’t say “everything is okay”, just start putting your emotions to words. Does the situation make you feel afraid? Angry? Sad? Take a moment to become aware of your emotions.
PHASE 2: OH GOD…
This is your release phase. Once you can put words to your emotions, this is where we let it go. Close your eyes and slowly breathe through your nose until you feel yourself relax and let the feeling go.
PHASE 3: OH JEEZ.
This is your recenter phase. Letting go of the emotions through breathing is key because in the “Oh Jeez” step, you go a little deeper. Once you’ve gone through the Oh God stage, try a multi level breathing exercise to bring you to a place of full relaxation. Goulston recommends repeating “Oh crap, oh god, oh jeez, oh well, and okay” until you are in a deep state of relaxation.
PHASE 4: OH WELL!
This is your refocus phase. Now that you’ve put yourself into a state of relaxation, your frontal lobe can think clearly and efficiently. Take this time to figure out, what can you do to control the damage?
PHASE 5: OKAY.
This is your re-engage phase. Now that you’ve calmed down and figured out what you need to do - TAKE ACTION. Be productive and put the plan from phase 4 into action to fix the mess you’re panicking about.
Just like everything else in life, this will feel awkward and difficult in the beginning, but the more you focus on it, the easier it will become. In fact, if you practice it enough, your brain will eventually learn to make these steps an automatic reaction to crisis situation.
So, there you have it. This is a great method to follow if you’re just starting out and looking to manage stress quickly in the middle of difficult situations.
I’ll be putting this practice to action and I’d love to hear your thoughts on it too! Comment below and let me know if you’d use this, have used it, or are going to try it out!
With love & light,
Carolyn RachelIt’s been awhile.
It always feels funny to check back into Tumblr, it’s been so long since I left, but I will always remember this blog and how much it helped me get to where I am now.
When I first started this blog, it was simply a weight loss blog.
I wanted support and I needed a place to hold myself accountable. Id been well over 300 lbs for well over 5 years and with my new diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis, I knew I was in trouble.
I’d tried to do it alone, through trainers, therapists, nutritionists, and doctors. I’d taken every pill and powder, counted points, and restricted calories, but none of it worked. I needed something else.
So, as a true millenial, I turned to the internet. Thank goodness I did.
If you go back and read, you’ll see that I came from a place of excuses. I wanted to lose weight, but I didn’t want to change. I hated the idea of giving up the foods that tasted good, the foods I thought I loved, because that would mean I would have to give up other parts of my life that gave me joy.
I loved going out to restaurants with my (now ex) boyfriend, having ice cream with the girls as we talked about boys, and bottomless mimosas over Sunday brunch meant laughing with my friends.
Food meant being social and being social meant feeling care free.
If I changed my food, I couldn’t do those things and sure, I might lose the weight, but would it be worth losing what made me happiest?
It was my choice to stay in that place, no matter how hard I thought I was trying. But by ignoring my health, it decided to take matters into it’s own hands.
When I lost feeling on my entire right side, I could no longer do those things that made me feel happy before. I could barely walk, especially not without a cane, that and my fatigue made it impossible for me to be social at all. It sounds crazy, but that finally gave me the opportunity to change my food because, sitting at home, it could no longer bring me that care free feeling I longed for.
And I knew that if I continued to choose food over my health, I wouldn’t be able to be social much in the future. I realized I’d rather feel good and skip the mimosas so I could still at least show up and hang out.
Now, I’ve lost over 145 lbs and go symptom free every day. Since I’ve gotten another chance at life, I’m not waiting for happiness through food anymore, now, I create my own. I’ve visited Machu Picchu, hiked mountains, rode in a bike marathon, and participated in a silent meditation retreat. My story has even been featured in some major magazines!
I still have MS, but the daily symptoms no longer control my daily abilities and I feel, in a large part, that the support that I got through this blog helped me get here. I am so grateful for that and grateful for each of you for reading.
I get to live a life I love every day, coaching people through their health obstacles so they can live their bucket list, and I couldn’t be happier. I still even have dairy free ice cream with the girls from time to time.
In other words, life is good. If you have any questions about healing your body, don’t hesitate to reach out. That’s what sharing the journey is all about.
With love,
Carolyn Rachel